20090615

I AM SECOND.

Currently listening to: Freshmoods - Rhythmbreeze
Current mood: Subdued.

I don't know a single thing about American Idol.

I don't know who Jason Castro is.

At least, not until this morning.

Last week I've learned that if the relational me won't ever have any relationship at all, (not even those of the Facebook type), if i am down with THAT ONE RELATIONSHIP that is really, really worth having, I would never have to look for any other relationship for the life of me. I would be more than complete. That relationship is a personal, intimate, moment-by-moment relationship with the Lover of my soul, my Lord and Savior, my God and King, my Redeemer, my Forever Faithful Friend, JESUS. I'm still working on it.. or rather, we're still working it out.

This morning, I learned about American Idol and who Jason Castro is and how - for the life of me - I won't ever get to be in American Idol. Haha!

Seriously, I've learned.. that in this lifetime - and even beyond it - I would never ever ever get to be first. Try as I might, train as I would, I would never ever ever really be first.

I play to have fun. I run to endure. I train to keep in shape and that's just about it. I am not a competitive person so it bugs me sometimes when I am seen as a 'threat' or possessing an 'uncanny' ability to pose a challenge. Geez.

For quite a good number of times, though I haven't really provoked anyone, I have been an unwilling gauge of greatness and intellect. I mean, duh, who am I? I am not out to prove anything, much less pose a challenge. I kid you not. I am the least competitive person there is and I more often than not challenge no one but myself.

This morning, however, God taught me something about service. I already knew about it but what kept me at the edge of my seat (like watching an action-packed, scary mystery movie) was this: Am I willing to be interrupted?

I've heard that question perhaps for around five times, different speakers, different instances.

You're asking moi?

I don't mind others getting ahead but I'm still learning to be willing to be interrupted.
In French: Je ne m'occupe pas de d'autres qui obtiennent en avant mais j'apprends toujours à être disposé à être interrompu.

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